I joke about having "issues" all the time.. hell, it's right there in the title of my blog! But apparently, I was right.
I've been feeling a little "off" lately. The best way to describe what I was feeling is to say that I had the worst case of nervous I've ever felt. You know: the butterflies in the stomach/ knot in your chest kind of nervous. I also felt really overwhelmed by things that normally would not overwhelm me. Opening my work email to find 10 unread emails, not unusual; feeling really overwhelmed by these 10 unread emails, that was unusual.
After one particularly bad "episode" - I won't go into details but it involves an irrational reaction to overcooked potatoes, the need to leave the situation immediately, and uncontrollable tears - I decided to go and talk to my doctor and... I do have ISSUES!
Actually, I have Anxiety. Anxiety brought on by stress to be exact. I am now walking around with 10 little "emergency" pills in my purse and am attempting to "identify the triggers of my anxiety". I'll tell you: knowing that you have 10 "emergency" pills in your purse and you're supposed to be "identifying triggers" makes you a little anxious. (and I don't think that this is the purpose of either the pills or task). But I'm working on figuring out what makes me anxious and how I can either avoid these things or handle them if they are unavoidable.
I originally was not going to blog about this. I thought that it was something private going on in my life that I didn't really want to share. Then I realized that this blog is about my private life. It's about me and what's going on with me.
I also thought that this post will probably help to explain this post.
Another reason I decided to blog about my anxiety is because I think that too many people are embarrassed to talk about anything that involves mental health. Anxiety Disorders, Depression, Postpartum Depression, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, these are all things that are real and that should not be ignored or hidden. My opinion is that while some people may need medication, all people need support. And no one can offer support if they are unaware of what's going on in your life.
I don't know how many people read this blog, but I hope that I can include you in my support system as I work on this, one of my many issues.